by Death Star
Or the last, if Garland was truly dead inside.
He knew Garland was hurting deeply inside, he had heard about Sharlena's death. The little kid he remembered so well from the station that was exploding, where his soon to be bride had died. He knew he needed to comfort Garland, but there was so much going on. Repairs, first. Then the funerals. He tried to consol Garland then, but it didn't work out, as Garland was trying to hide from sight. And until now, he had been too screwed up himself at this point. Something he thought he had worked out with all his years of solitude, coming to know himself. Ice Heart's death crushed him and made him hate, turning his back from others. Slash's dead killed another part of him, but the question was, would he again turn his back on his friend's and silently deal with the pain, or would he turn to them and gather strength? Unlike Garland, who desperately needed someone.
Death Star turned to look into the mirror, gazing at his reflection, ever so the same, except for the eye. As his human friends grew older, he continued to look the same. I need help. . . I can't do this alone. God, Slash, why did you have to leave me?
Slash, one of his three best friends, was dead. He had known him for around eighty years, worked beside him, cried beside him, and shared emotions with him. Now he was gone, killed by his own hand, just like Iceheart.
And Slash's other friend was on this station, and he needed to talk to him.
He stopped, glancing at a family gathered around in a room, a Christmas tree made out of a few of the trees grown on the ship, illegal to cut down like they had done, full of decorations scraped together from the ship. He gazed into the ship and felt a lonely ache in his chest. He never got a chance to spend a Christmas with Iceheart, but did have many with Slash. . . and Garland.
Death Star leaned back in his chair, a good cheer smile on his face as he wore a type of jester hat on his head, sitting next to Slash. Slash was just coming up in the Hunters, after he was discovered by Death Star when he teleported from Sigma's base when Zero tried to kill him. He was still probably wary, with Zero making it a known fact he was against having the "Maverick" around.
"Well, Slash, your first Christmas. Having fun?" he asked him. Slash glanced at him, wearing a limp Santa hat.
"...it's interesting, I'll say that much. Still, do we HAVE to listen to him sing Christmas carols?" Slash asked pitifully, pointing at Zero, who was throwing his head back, howling out the songs.
"Yes, yes we do. It makes up for the fact we don't have to pay taxes, I suppose," Death Star commented to Slash.
Slash grinned. "Shame. I would go up there and clog him one, but I wouldn't dare." Death Star shrugged, glancing down at his new promotion to Captain.
"Yeah, well, I know the feeling. If I could, I'd order him to shut up, but I don't stand on equal ground with him. 'Sides, everyone's glad he's back from the dead. It was a sad time when the Commander looked like he'd never come back. We all thought we were done for, espically when the X-Hunters began their revolt."
Slash nodded, a frown spreading across his face. "Still, doesn't mean I have to like him." Death Star knew what was going through his mind, upset at being Zero's 'clone'.
"Cheer up, Slash. You're my best friend, and that'll never change," Death Star told him.
"What about North Star? Haven't seen him lately," commented Slash slowly.
"Well, North Star and I haven't really been talking alot lately," Death Star told him, not adding that the North Star was jealous of Slash.
"Oh."
Death Star reached behind him, ignoring the singing Zero up ahead. "Here, Slash, I want you to have this." He handed Slash the present. "Merry Christmas."
"What is it?" asked Slash.
"An enhancement chip I had made for you. It'll enhance your abilities alot. Just thought you could use it."
Slash grinned. "Thanks. Sorry I don't have anything for you. . .yet."
Death Star shrugged. "Don't mention it, Slash. Hey, lets say we split from this party. I don't think I can take much more of this caroling."
Slash nodded. "A-men."
His arm literally shook with the strain going on in his "heart", so he removed it from the wall and allowed himself to lean against the wall, swallowing in the pain that was going through him.
Sitting down against the house he had been looking in, he glanced around, at how everyone was trying to forget their problems . . . to remember what Christmas was all about. He saw people giving around him, switching out presents.
A little girl walked up to him and looked at him strangely, holding onto her little bear. She was five, maybe six, and had big brown eyes and redish blonde hair. She wasn't even as tall as his leg, and her clothes were pretty worn out and torn, showing her family wasn't that rich. But there was a sparkle of a innocent nature. "Are ya' okay, mister?" she asked, her voice soft, tender, and a little bit curious about this stranger sitting outside her house, crying.
Death Star continue to stare at her, trying to hide the emotion on his face, to bury it deep, but found himself unable to in front of her. "I guess I'm a little down, 'hon."
She cocked her head and glanced at him, as if checking him out to see if he was okay. "Sad about not having anything for Christmas?"
He smiled at her warmly, drawn to her by her innocent nature, something Garland used to be full of and he hated, back then. "No, no 'hon. I'm a little upset over something. I . . . lost something very dear to me."
She frowned. "'Can I 'elp ya find it?" she offered.
Death Star shook his head mournfully. "I'm afraid not. What I lost . . . cannot be replaced, ever."
She looked at him, reflecting for a moment his sadness, sharing in his pain. "I'm sorry, mister. Is there anything I can do for 'ya to 'elp?"
Again, Death Star shook his head. "Thanks, 'hon, but I'm afraid you couldn't help me."
The little girl glanced at him warmly. "You shouldn't be sad, mister. It won't do you any good. Just rem...rem---think about the hap'py times ya had 'ith whatcha' lost, and 'en you'll always 'ave it in 'ya heart."
Death Star was amazed at the wisdom of the little girl before him that he smiled, his heart's aching soothed finally. Slash would always be with him, in his heart, and he'll always have the good times he had with Slash, never forgetting him. Slash would be apart of him forever. And their friendship would never end, even if he did have to kill him. "Thank you, 'hon. I understand now."
She smiled brightly and handed him her bear. "There 'ya go, mister. Something to replace ya 'ost thing." She gave him a bright smile and ran off. He sat there, holding the bear with a fragile love, and held it close to his chest as he stood up.
"Thank you."
Death Star glanced down at it. "Oh, uh, sorry about that. A little girl gave it to me earlier today. Just haven't bothered to put it up yet. I came straight here."
Drake nodded. "Ah. Just a little unusal to see someone of your status caring a child's teddy bear, after all."
"So? We all have the inner child inside us, do we not?" joked Death Star weakly.
Drake blinked and then caught the joke, laughing. "Ah, I got you. You're also funny, General."
"X-General. I was fired, remember."
Drake shrugged it off. "I could easily re-instate you to it. We could use in the Hunters again, after all."
Death Star nodded thoughtfully, something that had been weighing heavily on his shoulders since he had come back. He knew it was his duty to aid them, finally, in this war instead of using his organization like he did. Everyone knew he was alive, he might as well be there in the battle. "I know. But I don't want to be a General anymore."
Drake blinked in surprised. "You want a higher rank?"
"No, no, you misunderstood, I want to have a lower rank than Snipe. I don't want to seem to be in command. HE is, he should make the decisions. I'll just offer tactical advise."
Drake's eyebrow rose. "Knowing your character, and his, this will lead to conflict."
Death Star sighed. "I hope not."
"Well, it's glad to have the best Hunter back, anyway. Here, let me get the paperwork through," Drake offered.
He placed a box of items he had, which he managed to keep hidden during the fight. Slash almost destroyed them in his battle with him. Thinking about Slash caused a throb in his chest, and he knew the pain was still there, but bareable now. As long as he had others to remember Slash by, to hold onto when he needed, he could live. Friends were everything.
Sitting down on the stiff bed, he laid back on it and look at the ceiling. He needed to talk to Garland. The kid was hurting pretty bad, with the death of his daughter. But he didn't feel ready. Even with the Slash thing dealt with, he didn't feel like he could help Garland any.
He remembered telling Elayne that she could help him, and he knew she would try her damnest. At the funeral, he recalled Elayne saying that Garland had spiraled past her help, but he was going to be damned if he didn't TRY.
But not yet. He pulled himself and moved over to the box to unpack it.
Elayne watched him, a growing worry spreading across her face as Garland continued to push himself further and further away from everyone. "Oh, Dad. . . why?" she moaned to herself. She glanced at the food she had brought, still there, untouched and forgotten. Not that Garland really acknowledged her in the first place.
She stepped back into the shadows, doing the only thing she could. Watch and pray Garland would come back to his senses. And that Death Star to his and come here to aid him on his journey back.
Stepping out of their view, Death Star continued along, noticing alot of the food places that had sprung up, somehow, were crowded. He guessed that people were crowding around to eat Christmas dinner with each other. A sharp pang went through Death Star, wishing he could share Christmas with someone special, but knew it wouldn't happen.
He bumped into a young female. "Ouf!" he cried out, stumbling back and looking at her. She was a young woman in her mid twenties. Their eyes locked. "Uh, whuh. . ." he muttered, gazing into her eyes for a moment. She stammered, too, and blushed slightly.
"I, um, sorry about that, sir," she said slowly, her blue eyes sparkling as he looked at her.
"Uh, no problem, honestly," Death Star stammered, finding his tongue stuck in his mouth as he took her in, realizing she was beautiful. He felt young, again, like he did with Iceheart, but quickly shoved it off, like a stale wind, realizing what had happened to Iceheart.
"I...guess I'll see you around," she told him, moving around him and disappeared into the crowd once more.
"Yeah, see you around . . ." muttered Death Star, feeling a little sad he didn't follow her. But thoughts of the dead haunted him. He had no one to spend Christmas with, he reminded himself. Just friends. And that was enough. He wasn't out for love, not him. Not now. Not ever. He couldn't love again.
Turning away from the way the girl went, he walked down the streets. Yeah, could never love again. . . have to move on. I did, after all, rejoin the Hunters. Not full time, I made that clear to Drake, but part of the time. As an aid, to give advise, and to help out where I can. Go on some missions. But I'm not going to be full time, yet. I need freedom . . .yeah. No time for love. Then why did it feel so wrong?
Death Star turned onto another "street" and walked along, stopping on in front of a booth selling stuffed animals. A slow smile come across his face. He knew what he was going to do. Reaching down, he grab some gil and stepped up.
Walking back to the place he was, he looked around. It was dimly lit in the area he was in, so the people could go to sleep. Only the stores and resturantes were brightly lit right now, and they were far off. The sleepy quarters themselves remained darked and a little spooky.
As he walked along, he felt too uncannily spooked. This felt like a dark ally back on Earth. Maybe that was the design's purpose, after all.
Christmas lights, made out of different colored lightbulbs and items made by the mechanics and others on board the station for the people, their gift that Christmas, was on most of the houses. The colors glowed over him as he walked along, feeling happy, about to give someone a gift.
Almost like he did when he gave Slash that gift eighty or so years ago.
Stepping along, he noticed the door to the house of the girl broken in. Fear gripped him as he ran in and found the parent's on the floor, unconcious. He leaned down and shook the woman, who was in a pool of her own blood, all the while calling up MPs on the comm.
The woman blinked, confused. "Uh...who are you?"
"Lieutenant Colonol Death Star. What happened here?"
". . . burgular. . . after what . . . little money we had . . . took Marilyn. . .help her. . ." the mother cried out and then fell into a deep sleep, unmoving.
Death Star ran his hand along her face and stood up, throwing down a tracer for the MPs and moved out of the house. He scanned the area and picked up on two heat signals, recent, headed for the deserted levels of the ship.
"Damn, if they go into those levels, we could never find them in time...I have to hurry." Death Star ran after them, moving along the lower levels of the ship, scanning around him, hunting the burgular.
The chase continued lower and lower into the levels of the ship, where the light was almost non-existant. Who knew what horror had decided to live down here, cut off from the rest of the world above?
Finally the scan picked the two up, on the same level as he was. Drawing his Hyper Saber, an enhanced version of the Turbo Saber, he kept it off, moving along the dark towards the two. He could hear voices, threats. The girl was his only concern, everything else melting away as he drew closer to her. It was Christmas, a time of cheer, everything would work out. He hoped.
Finally he was within ten feet when the burgular heard him and turned. "STOP!" Death Star complied, hidden in the dark. "SHOW YOURSELF!" Death Star flicked on his saber, the pale light glowing off enough to show both of them. The girl's face was wide in terror. "WHO ARE YOU, MAN!?"
"Someone who just wants to take the girl and go. I won't hurt you if you hand her over, I promise."
"Like hell, man." The man moved back, holding a laser rifle up to the girl's head. "I swear, man, I'll pop her if you make any sudden moves."
Death Star nodded, believing him. "I just want to have her back safely. What can I do to show you that?" he asked slowly.
"No way, man, I'm keeping her. She's me one way ticket off of here with all my money." Damn, he would kill her easily once they are off this station. I can't allow that.
"Listen, pal, I can't let you carry off the girl. We both know what would happen if that was to be allowed. Now, I can let you go without hassal, I swear. Just don't harm or take her," Death Star coaxed.
"Screw you man," the man said and pulled the trigger, hitting the girl in the chest. She dropped back, hitting the ground with a thud. Death Star was on him in a second, slashing him in half, too late to help the girl.
She coughed, in pain, her life fading. Death Star reached down to scope her up, but she screamed in pain so she stopped. The young girl cried in pain, holding onto his leg as she did so. He called the MPs and ordered Medics to come down where he was. Turning back to the girl, he said a silent prayer for her, hoping she wouldn't die.
"Mis-mister?" she cried out.
"I'm here, 'hon."
"---'ya feelin' better?" she asked, still innocent. Death Star felt tears come to his eyes as he handed her the stuffed animal he got for her. She cuddled up against it, her blood soaking into it.
"Yeah, 'hon, a lot. Thanks to you. I got you something."
"Thanks."
"Merry Christmas, 'hon."
Time seem to drag. "Will ya tell me a story?" she asked weakly.
"I - - I don't know anymore, 'hon." Dammit?! Where are those medics?!
"Tell me a Christmas story, please." It was all she could do to manage the words.
Death Star leaned against the wall, holding her, unable to move her or heal her, and felt helpless. "Sure, 'hon. . ." he began, his memories drifting back to the past, and he began his tale for her.
X1 blinked. "Christmas par-ty? Who, me? Try to make a bunch of Hunters feel HAPPY when they are all standing around looking like they were just shot? Naaaah, you meant Christmas Morgue."
Death Star raised his eyebrow. "Not very good humor, coming from you, X1."
"So sue me. I'll rewrite my lines."
Death Star watched X1 grab a sheet of paper and rewrite some lines on it. ". . . what are you doing?" he asked warily.
"There, rewrote my lines. "Christmas par-ty? Who, me? Try to make a bunch of Hunters feel HAPPY when they are all standing around looking like they were just shot? Naaaah, you meant Christmas Morgue."
Death Star blinked, confused. "But you didn't change your lines."
"Right, I didn't give a damn what you thought. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to cook."
"Oh, God."
"Zip it!"
Death Star glared as X1 walked off from him. "A party? This is the worst idea since X1 came up with unsliced bread. Dammit, and I'm going to be FORCED to attend or he'll write me up as being the anti-damn-cheer."
"This is STUPID," Death Star voiced to the others as they were all lured into the room with him. Wiendigo leaned against the tree, bending it rather roughly, smoking his cigar.
"Oh, really, dumbshit? And you figured this out, by using your BRAIN for once? That's just a friggin' miracle," he snorted.
Dominator glared. "Cool it, Wiendigo. This is suppose to be a time of CHEER, not of ranting and raving. Can't you just ACT happy for once?"
Wiendigo blew some smoke into his face. "No."
Garland ran by the three, grabbing a present with his name on it and shook it roughly. "Is this for me?!?" he asked innocently.
Dominator nodded. "Sure is, Garland. You get to open it later."
Death Star scoffed. "Hmph. Kid, I wouldn't touch that present if my life dependant on it."
Garland looked at him confused. "Why, Mr. Death Star?"
"Because it's from X1. It'll probably explode in your face or something, knowing him." Garland blinked at Death Star.
Wiendigo cut in. "Oh, please, do open it. Albert didn't do a good job of ridding you earlier."
Dominator glared. "WIENDIGO!"
Shadow Knight stood there, looking at the four. "Don't worry, Dominator, I scanned the package . . . it is safe."
Slasher glanced at him. "Doesn't that defeat the purpose of a surprise?"
Shadow Knight shrugged. "Perhaps."
Wiendigo grabbed his package and began to throw it around. "I say we open the packages, acting nice, and then get the hell out of here. Unlike you idiots, I do have more important things to do with my time than spend it with you."
Death Star snorted. "We could just bash your present over your head and throw you out."
Wiendigo got into his face. "You could just TRY."
Pulling back his fist, Death Star was about to lay into Wiendigo when a low throat clearing could be heard. They both glanced to the right and saw X1, all dressed up, holding onto a huge cake that he was placing on the table. "If you two can't play nicely, you'll have to eat outside. Together."
Wiendigo spit at him. "You wish."
X1 met his gaze. "Don't be testy, Wiendigo, or Santa won't give you a gift."
Wiendigo shrugged. "Look at me shake in my boots."
Garland rattled his present more, annoying Death Star. "Can I open it now, can I? Can I?" he kept asking.
X1 shrugged. "I guess we can open presents first, then eat."
Garland jumped up and down with joy and tore into the present, pulling out a device. "Uh, what does this do?"
Death Star and Dominator glanced at it. "Sure looks like a bomb," they both muttered.
X1 coughed. "Oh ye of little faith."
Dominator shrugged. "Well, you never know."
"Know what?" asked X1.
Dominator blinked. "About you."
"You know about me!?" X1 paniced.
Wiendigo nodded, smoking his cigar. "Yes, he knows all about your little habits with giant chickens and mimes."
X1 looked around. "Oh, dear. Am I going to have another Charleston event?"
Death Star cleared his throat loudly. "May we finish opening presents?"
Garland glanced at his. "What does it do?"
X1 looked around, biting on his finger nails. "The British are coming! The British are coming."
Wiendigo flicked the cigar against Death Star's head. "Looks like the caretaker has fallen into insanity and we can escape."
"He locked the doors," Shadow Knight told him.
Wiendigo attempted to move into the shadows to escape but failed. Slasher laughed and was rewarded a whack on the head.
Dominator handed Garland another present. "Here, I got this for you, Garland."
Garland jumped up and down happily and tore into the present. It was a book on Earth for Garland to read and learn about. "Thank you, Mr. Dominator!" Garland ran over and hugged him.
"Kodak moment," Slash commented.
"Oh, joy, why not open YOURS next," asked Death Star.
Slash reached down and opened his, from X1, and receieved some underwear. "What the hell . . .?"
Wiendigo snorted. "Like a pansy like you would need them."
Slash hit Wiendigo, only to start a short, and brief fight between the two until X1 clunked them both.
Death Star kicked his present some while everyone else opened theirs, gaining unusual and unuseful gifts from X1. When it came to his turn, he took his saber and peeled off the wrapping paper to see a frame for a picture. Scoffing at it, he reached down and picked it up, pocketing it. "Oh, gee, thanks, X1. What I always wanted."
The Christmas dinner that followed ended shortly, and messily, and everyone went their seperate ways.
He glanced at his desk, with the teddy bear on it, it's gaze at him, almost. "Why, why do things happen? Can anyone really understand?" The bear, of course, had no answer for him, not that he expected one, really.
Death Star's eyes flickered to the frame he got from X1 twenty years ago, which now held a picture of him, X1, Garland, and Sharlena, all posing after their encounter with Iceheart and Dark Strider on the maverick station. It was his idea, for come reason, and he doubted Garland or X1 remembered having it made.
"You should talk to him, you know." Death Star whirled around and looked at the shadow that was in his dark room, standing behind him.
". . . Elayne?" he called out.
Elayne nodded, stepping into the light. He looked over the young girl that was like a daughter to him. She was very pretty in his eyes, and he knew she would make someone happy one day. But he didn't feel connected to her, for some reason. "You should talk to Garland," she repeated, pointing at the picture.
Death Star turned back to it, not bothering to ask how she got into his room. "Too true. I've . . . been on other things. Dwelling, even. Damn me."
Elayne shook her head. "Dwelling is only dangerous if you don't realize it."
"Too true. But I got over . . . Slash's death, thankfully. I feel ready to move on now." Shame about the girl, though. Life is too precious.
"He's pushing himself too hard, Death Star, way too hard. He needs you," Elayne continued.
"And I him."
"Will you talk to him?" she asked.
Death Star nodded slowly. "He's like a son to me. Of course I am. I hope I'm not too late, that I haven't waited too long."
Elayne smiled. "Thanks!" She lingered for a moment, thinking on how Death Star was like her real father, Airier, who was a human clone of him. Then she was gone.
Death Star's hand wavered over the picture on his desk and scopped it up and went off to buy some wrapping paper. It was time to face Garland. And finally learn if his best friend, who was like a son to him, was truly dead.